Art and visual erotica that depicts masculine submission. We showcase beautiful imagery where men and other male-identified people are submissive subjects. We aim to challenge stereotypes of the “pathetic” submissive man. Learn more…. Your steward is maymay. Want to collaborate with me? It’s easy: visit MaleSubmissionArt.com/submit or tag your Delicious.com bookmarks as for:MaleSubmissionArt! More ways to contribute…. Original work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License. We make a concerted effort to attribute works properly; please show us, and the artists whose work we feature, the same courtesy. Please redistribute this work; you are not stealing. Tumblr (3.0; @malesubmissionart)http://malesubmissionart.com/<img src="http://26.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lnw618Zhrb1qzs83zo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>A very old man closes his eyes as a tag and padlock are affixed to a wavy metal collar encircling his neck.</p> <p>Today, I turned 27, and <a href="http://maymay.net/blog/2011/06/20/and-so-she-was-beautiful-to-me/">I am afraid</a>. When I look to the future, I feel capable of seeing only the single stereotype of older submissive men that exists: alone, disgusting, and desperate. I like this picture because it offers an escape, however fleeting, from that <a href="http://psychcentral.com/lib/2007/what-is-catastrophizing/">catastrophizing</a>.</p> <p>Today, I turned 27, and <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/05/19/story-of-how-to-improve-the-future-always-hate-the-status-quo/">I am angry</a>. <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/6436018453/when-sex-positive-is-a-euphemism-for-male-gaze">Everywhere I look in public</a>, there are <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/7042538776/you-have-a-magic-others-dont-use-it">different discussions happening than everywhere I look in private</a>. When I try to articulate this difference, <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/6669441133/as-a-woman-who-cannot-imagine-feeling-anything-but-awe">it rarely receives public acknowledgement</a>. So <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/05/02/my-unreal-experience-on-the-kink-inc-armory-tour/#comment-156190">I lash out in barely-restrained anger at people I ought not</a>. <a href="http://333images.tumblr.com/post/4863703532">These comments</a> are another good illustration:</p> <blockquote> <p>Before I ever wore a collar, I read about other submissives being collared on blogs, and I thought it sounded nice, but in a ritualistic way that seemed a little hokey to me.  Still, it seemed meaningful for them.</p> <p>I like to imagine the man in this picture has been a submissive all his life, but only now he’s been able to act on that and find a dominant lover.  And here he is, being collared at last, when he’s 84.  That seems very romantic….</p> </blockquote> <p>Think, for a moment, how 84 years of unrequited submissive desire might feel. Only in <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/04/20/we-are-all-victims-even-the-revolutionaries/">as sick a world as ours</a> could this be called “romantic.” <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/5989733039/a-secret-shared-via-submissive-secrets-a">It should be called epistemic abuse</a>.</p> <p>Today, I turned 27, and <a href="https://twitter.com/maymaym/status/87801400960106496">I am diffident</a>. Ironically, my reputation as the author of this website could be turned into more opportunities to play and <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2007/11/26/while-fucking-i-prefer-to-get-fucked/">fuck the way I want</a> than I ever imagined. But in <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/7245985023/good-awkwardness-at-sti-screening">that reality</a> I can no longer honestly count myself among the men for whom I want my writings to speak.</p> <p>Please understand that <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2010/10/13/its-not-changing-the-world-thats-hard/">I feel as though I was the creepy old guy before he was either creepy or old</a>. <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/06/02/signal-boost-the-devaluation-of-male-submission/">I was hurting</a> because <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2007/11/15/the-closet-and-the-importance-of-others/">the community where I felt most at home</a> was <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/7137477514/t-he-research-seems-to-indicate-that-more-kinky">the same one that made me feel the most unattractive</a>.</p> <p>So as my youth—that other stereotype of sexual desirability—inevitably slips further away, I grow more afraid. And the <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/7041813168/im-used-to-unfair-and-painful-but-i-had-for">more I’m told to “count my blessings,” the angrier I get</a>, not because I’ve got nothing going for me, but because I cannot abide a world in which <a href="https://twitter.com/maymaym/statuses/85581992439197696">some of us are so love- and touch-starved</a> that getting something back from sharing really personal fears with the Internet is considered a “blessing” in the first place.</p> <p>I think <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/4714863852/help-me-desimplify-deconstruct-rape-and-sex">we can do better</a>. What’s stopping us?</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/7289051309http://malesubmissionart.com/post/7289051309Tue, 05 Jul 2011 20:07:00 -0700tumblrizephotograph<img src="http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_llzy1hajAP1qzs83zo1_r1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1810" rel="attachment wp-att-1810"></a>A man bound with his arms above his head bites his lip as a woman wearing a sunhat gropes him and smiles.</p> <p>Shortly after I saw <a href="http://secrets.malesubmissionart.com/post/5960676271/image-the-male-submission-art-tumblr-with">this contribution to Submissive Secrets</a>, <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/5971706174/this-is-the-most-personal-awesomely-meta-thing">I reblogged it on my personal Tumblr</a> to ask for more images featuring both male submission <em>and</em> body-positivity. Almost immediately after <em>that</em>, <a href="http://ireensarrows.tumblr.com/">ireensarrows</a> suggested this photograph. Then, after <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/5989733039/a-secret-shared-via-submissive-secrets-a">using that “secret” to announce Submissive Secrets on Male Submission Art</a>, <a href="http://mswyrr.tumblr.com/">mswyrr</a> independently <a href="https://twitter.com/maymaym/status/75071345121181696">suggested the exact same photograph</a>.</p> <p>I could not have been more pleased. Not only is this picture a gorgeous contribution in its own right—look at her smile, his responsiveness, the bondage!—the models are none other than my friends <a href="http://kittystryker.tumblr.com/">Kitty Stryker</a>, <a href="http://purrversatility.blogspot.com/2010/02/no-i-dont-mean-phat-nsfw.html">a self-identified fat girl</a>, and her partner (whose self-identification I am unaware of but who is certainly <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/117950548/a-man-whose-wrists-are-handcuffed-behind-his-back">larger in size than I am</a>); I recognized them immediately. Moreover, the image is <a href="http://filamentmag.livejournal.com/44257.html">sourced from the Filament Magazine blog</a>, whose author, <a href="http://wiki.KinkOnTap.com/wiki/Suraya_Singh">Suraya Singh</a>, has been a <a href="http://kinkontap.com/?p=196">repeat</a> guest <a href="http://kinkontap.com/?p=669">on the netcast I produce, Kink On Tap</a>.</p> <p>In one hand, the fact that there seems to be such a small group of Good People doing this Good Work is disquieting. In the other, I’m reminded how despite the fact that only 2% of Americans were actively involved in the civil rights movement, they had an enormous impact. (And while I cannot verify that statistic, I also don’t wish to see it debunked because it gives me hope.)</p> <p>mswyrr had this to say:</p> <blockquote><p>In response to the secret you posted: submissive boys with body fat are fucking gorgeous, too. Sweet and touchable. I could cuddle up to a boy and stroke his soft tummy in quiet bliss for hours. There are no words!</p> <p>I like skinny boys, too. But, among the minority of images portraying male submission, it is a sad fact that thin men and buff men are most widely represented. I’m submitting this image because it’s one of the few I’ve found of a big, beautiful fellow. Guh.</p></blockquote> <p>As <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1702071850/search-for-pictures-of-men-being-submissive-and">I’ve said before</a>, the sheer number of duplicate suggestions this blog gets evinces the paltry availability of quality erotic images featuring marginalized groups. Even the way <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/91850568/an-unimportant-uninteresting-man-is-hidden-behind">“male submission” is often (mis)understood as “femdom”</a> reveals a fractal pattern of <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/5946448134/the-difference-between-categorical-and">categorical privilege</a> flipped upside-down when it comes to sexuality. Though not always welcome attention, <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/64438654/a-caged-man-wearing-a-collar-reaches-for-a-drink">fat women are sometimes fetishized</a>, while fat men are overwhelmingly portrayed as purely repulsive.</p> <p>Kitty has written about the “<a href="http://purrversatility.blogspot.com/2009/05/rather-weighty-issue.html">rather weighty issue</a>” of her size:</p> <blockquote cite="http://purrversatility.blogspot.com/2009/05/rather-weighty-issue.html"><p>[I]f I’m just having a self-concious sort of day, I get a bit nervous stripping down. I make sure my panties are smoothed over my belly in a way that disguises the way it curves to my pubic hair. […] I wouldn’t say I don’t like [my body]—I do, we go through a lot together, it and I, and I have few complaints—I think I feel uncertain of it, more, unsure that it’s up to par.</p></blockquote> <p>Although written by a woman, these are sentiments I imagine many fat men can relate to. As with most issues regarding self-esteem, the <a href="http://KinkOnTap.com/?p=748">discussion is dominated by women’s insecurities</a>, leaving <a href="http://www.ted.com/talks/tony_porter_a_call_to_men.html">men trapped in the Man Box</a>. As a result, fat men frequently face <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/94133599/a-muscular-gray-haired-man-is-tied-naked-to-a">similar sexual erasure</a> as other “other”-ed groups. Sadly, they have few places, if any, to experience being desired—as they are.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/5993988303http://malesubmissionart.com/post/5993988303Sun, 29 May 2011 23:58:28 -0700tumblrizebondagephotograph<img src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_llzpb1BA3d1qzs83zo1_r3_500.png"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1804" rel="attachment wp-att-1804"></a><a href="http://secrets.malesubmissionart.com/post/5960676271">A “secret” shared via Submissive Secrets</a>, a community art project based on the <a href="http://postsecret.com/">PostSecret</a> concept and <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/04/20/we-are-all-victims-even-the-revolutionaries/#comment-145331">inspired by several contributions</a> to the <a href="http://queersecrets.tumblr.com/">Queer Secrets Tumblr</a> regarding BDSM. The secret is:</p> <blockquote cite="http://secrets.malesubmissionart.com/post/5960676271"><p>[ Image: the Male Submission Art tumblr, with title changed to Male Submission Art With Over 15% Body Fat. The search box says “men who look like me” and the content column is blank. Text: I must have heard it over 100 times: “I like curvy women but skinny guys.” I know most guys aren’t supposed to be anxious about their bodies. But I wouldn’t be here in the first place if I was most guys. ]</p></blockquote> <p>I’m posting this here because, after years of <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/05/19/story-of-how-to-improve-the-future-always-hate-the-status-quo/">sharing pieces of my story with you</a>, I’d like to invite you to share a piece of your story with me.</p> <p>As you may know, <a href="http://MaleSubmissionArt.com/">Male Submission Art</a> was a website <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2008/11/19/malesubmissionartcom-or-why-i-am-crowdsourcing-my-own-pornography/">created in a fit of frustration</a>. At its root, this website is a response to (epistemically abusive) pain. Specifically, it’s a response to the pain inflicted by the sometimes inescapable presumption of male dominance.</p> <p>I maintain that although this pain is not a universal experience, it is an underreported, under-appreciated, and above all underrepresented manifestation of <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/05/02/my-unreal-experience-on-the-kink-inc-armory-tour/">the abuse culture in which we live</a>. <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/116275731/a-naked-couple-is-having-sexual-intercourse-in-the">Abuse culture spawns rape culture</a>. But <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2007/12/06/transgender-basics/">abuse culture also spawns transphobia</a>. It spawns <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/5498352136/an-opulently-dressed-man-in-greek-inspired">psychopathic “blinding macho” socialization</a>. And, as this secret <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/5971706174/this-is-the-most-personal-awesomely-meta-thing">makes so beautifully clear</a>, it spawns body-negativity.</p> <p>I, for one, am sick and tired of <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1026977007/a-naked-man-tied-in-full-body-natural-colored-hemp">being sick and tired</a>—I am tired of <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/03/10/its-foggy-today-how-bdsm-and-sex-can-be-emotional-self-medication-in-a-cruel-world/">feeling alone</a>. And so, in a fit of frustration, like Male Submission Art before it, I recently made a spinoff website called <a href="http://secrets.MaleSubmissionArt.com/">Submissive Secrets</a> as a response to <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/5771100510/submissivesecrets-image-white-woman-with">this pain</a>.</p> <p>In his blog, <a href="http://blogs.suntimes.com/ebert/2010/11/all_the_lonely_people.html">Roger Ebert described the effect of loneliness</a> like this:</p> <blockquote cite="http://blogs.suntimes.com/ebert/2010/11/all_the_lonely_people.html"><p>When I was a child the mailman came once a day. Now the mail arrives every moment. I used to believe it was preposterous that people could fall in love online. Now I see that all relationships are virtual, even those that take place in person. Whether we use our bodies or a keyboard, it all comes down to two minds crying out from their solitude.</p></blockquote> <p>My experience blogging at Male Submission Art has been a remarkable education in the way one might use a keyboard to cry out from one’s solitude. It embodies, in cyberspace, my own desperate attempt to transform things that harm me into things that help me. But this website is largely <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2009/06/02/why-malesubmissionartcom-doesnt-have-comments/#comment-22449">still about me</a> and so, at times, I have felt regret that my own pain sometimes prevented me from updating this site on a more regular basis because I know <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/playground/malesubmissionartcom/praise/">how much it has helped others</a>.</p> <p>Now that <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/5114388165/every-time-i-see-a-picture-that-was-once-featured">I know I’m not alone</a>, this website is no longer enough. As I wrote on <a href="http://secrets.MaleSubmissionArt.com/about/">the Submissive Secrets about page</a>:</p> <blockquote cite="http://secrets.MaleSubmissionArt.com/about/"><p>I believe it is time to tell the stories and share the thoughts, feelings, desires, and fears submissive men and those who love them have in a way that offers solidarity, compassion, empathy, trust, sympathy, lust, and, of course, love. </p> <p>[…]</p> <p>Since storytelling is the foundation of any movement, I want to collect the stories of any male, male-identified, or masculine-of-center person who’s submissively inclined or curious. And I also want to collect the stories of everyone else who is attracted to, interested in, or supportive of such drives for personal fulfillment. And then, once we have all shared our stories about these experiences, we will have made the world a better place for it, and, together, we are going to show everyone that it is good to be the kind of people we are.</p> <p>It’s true we are not all identical; we have a variety of different tastes. But we are all human. And we all deserve to be happy. So <strong>if we can’t just snap our fingers and make everyone happy, the least we can do is make ourselves heard</strong>.</p> <p>[…]</p> <p>My hope is that with everyone sharing pieces of their story, we will weave a beautiful patchwork tapestry.</p></blockquote> <p>And so, from my mind to yours, I invite you: <a href="http://secrets.MaleSubmissionArt.com/submit">be heard</a>.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/5989733039http://malesubmissionart.com/post/5989733039Sun, 29 May 2011 20:48:07 -0700tumblrize<img src="http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ll7vvqV3o11qzs83zo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>An opulently dressed man in Greek-inspired clothing and greaves leans backwards onto a ledge as a similarly-dressed woman holds him by the waist and grips his hair.</p> <p>Here’s a complex picture whose <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/879252420/a-clothed-man-is-bound-to-a-heavy-chair-with-long">layered meanings become more complex as one learns its context</a>. Suggested independently by both Science Me Harder and Svollga, the image is a photograph from a 1932 stage production of The Warrior’s Husband (one year before <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0024753/">it became a Hollywood screenplay</a>) showing <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/40045986@N00/3181533264/">Katharine Hepburn in the role of Antiope</a>, an Amazon royal, and Colin Keith-Johnston in the role of Theseus, leader of the Greek army. It’s a gorgeous picture for all the reasons Science Me Harder enumerates:</p> <blockquote> <p>[T]his picture always strikes me as beautiful because of the way the woman holds the man’s hair and supports him with her other arm, and especially the way the man seems to be standing so still and willing to be held with his eyes closed.</p> </blockquote> <p><a href="http://svollga.tumblr.com/">Svollga</a> shared similar sentiments:</p> <blockquote> <p>I was very attracted to this image, both because it’s beautiful (the lines! the poses! the dynamics!) and because to me, it speaks clearly of power exchange and female domination. The historical context only adds more layers to the feeling. (Not to mention that it hits a lot of my kinks, from gender role-reversal to hair-gripping.)</p> <p>It looks like a reversal of roles for the bodice-ripper cover. Usually, it’s a man holding a woman around a waist, leaning her back, even gripping her hair. Here, the woman (and a very feminine one) does it all to a (big and strong) man—and he seems to like it. They are both very sensual and relaxed in this picture. It looks like a foreplay where people are either well-acquainted or just very comfortable with each other, and they are actually <em>playing</em> while being quite serious about it.</p> </blockquote> <p>While I share Svollga’s enthrallment with this picture, <a href="http://beyondthehills.wordpress.com/2008/09/28/where-is-the-male-submission-art/">overt role-reversal was intentionally comedic</a> in the 1930s. The “historical context” is quite different than what one might hope. According to <a href="http://www.davidmanners.com/warriorshusband.html">the 1933 screenplay’s description</a>, The Warrior’s Husband is not a tale of female domination, but rather voluntary female subordination:</p> <blockquote> <p>The Warrior’s Husband is a satire of the male and female roles in society set in 800 B.C. starring Elissa Landi as Antiope, an Amazonian beauty and sister to the queen of Pontus. Queen Hippolyta (Marjorie Rambeau) rules Pontus with masculine authority; in fact, it is the women of Pontus who do all the laboring, fighting, and governing. Hippolyta’s husband Sapiens (Ernest Truex) is truly a sissy of the first order, and is not unlike most of Pontus’ male inhabitants. When the Greek army under Theseus (DM) invades in pursuit of the queen’s “magic girdle,” the appearance of real men on the scene is strange and unnerving to the women of Pontus. Struck by Antiope’s beauty Theseus woos her and, reluctantly at first, she falls in love with him. Realizing the value of male leadership, the Amazons willingly allow the men to assume control.</p> </blockquote> <p>Lacking context, <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/61465143/in-this-painting-by-pre-raphaelite-painter-edmund">we can easily project our fantasies onto this image</a> but when we factor in the story’s plot we see that gender roles were not actually reversed. Even before the story’s culmination in the patriarchy we’re familiar with, “masculine authority” was used to rule Pontus and its “sissy” male inhabitants were not “real men.” Reversing anatomy does not in fact reverse gender role because <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2007/12/06/transgender-basics/">gender is not the same as sex</a>; in Pontus, women functioned as men only so long as “real men” were not present, while men functioned as women until they were replaced by <a href="http://companionsofthegarden.blogspot.com/2011/04/kathleen-barry-on-unmaking-war-remaking.html">abusive psychopaths wielding weapons who suffer from what Kathleen Barry calls “blinding macho” socialization</a>.</p> <p>In this way, The Warrior’s Husband is a useful parable explaining the contemporary BDSM community’s shared delusion. Although <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/05/02/my-unreal-experience-on-the-kink-inc-armory-tour/">the community’s sycophants like to tout their “diversity,”</a> most organized elements of “The Scene” essentially recreate Pontus by <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/03/31/good-boy-and-other-kinds-of-complicated-sex/">equating performances of masculinity with domination and performances of femininity with submission</a>. In The Scene, things are only cursorily more complex since <a href="http://yesmeansyesblog.wordpress.com/2011/05/02/domism-role-essentialism-and-sexism-intersectionality-in-the-bdsm-scene/">dominance is privileged while submission is devalued regardless of one’s genitalia</a>.</p> <p>While there is certainly <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/155916118/a-man-facing-a-mirror-is-pressed-toward-the-wall">space for gender role-reversal within BDSM</a>, by ignorantly supplanting the overculture’s (man/woman) gender binary with their own (dominant/submissive) power binary, <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2010/12/02/the-bdsm-community-ghetto-and-other-cultural-problems/">BDSM’ers sabotage the possibility for creative expression</a> within their scenes and <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/111300489/a-naked-man-with-an-erection-lays-on-the-floor-and">undercut whatever credibility they wish to claim</a> on the matter.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p> <p><a href="http://oldhollywood.tumblr.com/post/1081211740">oldhollywood</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><strong>Katharine Hepburn</strong> as Amazon warrior princess Antiope & <strong>Colin Keith-Johnston</strong> as Theseus in stage production of <em>The Warrior’s Husband</em> (1932) (via corbis)</p> </blockquote>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/5498352136http://malesubmissionart.com/post/5498352136Sat, 14 May 2011 20:19:00 -0700photographblack and white<img src="http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lgws0jxTlA1qzs83zo1_r5_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1720" rel="attachment wp-att-1720"></a>Lightly blindfolded and holding the handle of a flogger in hir mouth, a trans-male bottom is beaten by an enthusiastic top.</p> <p>This photograph is part of a <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/turtlesthatyoulove/sets/72157624408701274/">set in an album called <cite>Kinky Tea Party</cite></a>, although it arrived with a note titled “Reverse-tea scene,” which is perhaps a more accurate name. The set has numerous fantastic images, and I couldn’t easily decide which to feature here. Ultimately, I felt drawn to the emotional and physical exposure in this one; both models are emotive and, despite the <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/230687411/a-man-is-bound-gagged-and-laid-across-train">violent symbolism</a> inherent in the sadomasochistic act, <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/293181170/a-man-bites-down-on-a-staff-while-another-pokes">neither model embodies violence</a>.</p> <p>That said, I’d be remiss not to point you at the <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/turtlesthatyoulove/4756050872/in/set-72157624408701274/">other photographs</a> in <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/turtlesthatyoulove/4756047102/in/set-72157624408701274/">the set</a> I think are particularly <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/turtlesthatyoulove/4756044816/in/set-72157624408701274/">beautiful</a>, especially because they reveal a wider, even more <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/879252420/a-clothed-man-is-bound-to-a-heavy-chair-with-long">fascinating context</a> to the photo shoot, which Sadie, who contributed this image, explained:</p> <blockquote><p>I am Sadie, the grinning trans-womyn in the photos. My partner, the GQ [genderqueer] trans-male identified play-thing in the photos is Tanner Fierce. The femme GQ photographer is my dear friend Milo Ampersand.</p> <p>The premise for this shoot was that there is an intentional and awkward disconnect between polite society and the sexual reality of all human interactions. Milo arranged a half-dozen of hir friends to have a well-dressed tea-party. Tanner and I had a flogging scene in their midst, and the party-goers were dis-allowed from looking at or acknowledging our presence in any way, as they sipped tea and spoke in faux British accents of the weather and local politics.</p> <p>What was especially exciting about this scene was the tension between Tanner’s physical submission, and the party-goers psychological submission. In particular, the man in the grey suit (who is one of Tanner’s best friends) was exquisitely torn between the instruction to abstain from looking, and the irresistible desire to engage with the sexual reality of the space. This tension, and the power of dominating without any direct interaction was the primary appeal of the scene. The result was what I have come to think of as a reverse-tea scene, where everyone serves themselves tea, for one-domme’s pleasure.</p></blockquote> <p>That. Is. Awesome.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/3399824574http://malesubmissionart.com/post/3399824574Sun, 20 Feb 2011 01:07:29 -0800tumblrizemarksphotograph<img src="http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lgt3wjeu8w1qzs83zo1_r5_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1599" rel="attachment wp-att-1599"></a>A young man, gagged with ribbon, clutches at the white sheets he’s resting on.</p> <p>This image of a “submissive boy with a rosary” was suggested by Emily Marigold. I like it in part for the obvious talent in the drawing, the signs of anguish, evinced by lacerations on the man’s shoulder and the smudged eyeliner, and the fact that he’s wearing eyeliner in the first place. And, yes, I also like seeing the broken rosary, since it offers a narrative hook to imagine him as someone religiously persecuted—<a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/96332082/a-long-haired-man-is-loosely-bound-to-a-pillar">a martyr</a>.</p> <p>Martyrdom is a common narrative among BDSM players; “I’ll take it <em>for you</em>.” Certainly sexy, but many utilize the script to abdicate personal agency; rarely do these bottoms remember the more important words: “<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2007/07/16/dont-be-nice/"><em>I want to</em> take it for you</a>.” As <a href="https://twitter.com/maymaym/statuses/36901942496075776">Dr. Staci Newmahr writes</a>, “Martyrdom bottoming does not rely on the ultimate denial of pleasure, but in adherence to a martyr script.”</p> <p>It’s unfair to <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/02/01/in-which-i-am-an-asshole-about-sexual-authoritarianism/">levy blame on the bottoms</a> who display such <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/02/05/why-calling-your-own-side-out-is-hard-musings-on-principles-and-advocacy/">unthinking loyalty</a> to this cultural script, though, especially the men. Other than martyrdom, common characterizations of men bottoming rely on archetypal feminization, whether implicitly (the meme of submissive men doing housework is a particularly sexist example) or explicitly (“<a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/135574134/a-naked-man-hangs-an-american-flag-against-a-brick">sissified sissy maids who insist on talking about their sissy clitty</a>”). These are obviously problematic formulations for any masculine-of-center individuals, not <em>just</em> men.</p> <p>This may explain why I’ve seen what’s become a predictable uptick in suggestions to this site <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/101284433/standing-against-a-tree-a-shirtless-young-man">featuring Saint Sebastian</a>, perhaps the <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/68288784/in-this-painting-which-i-believe-is-intended-to">most famous</a> <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/73745745/in-juxtaposed-modern-interpretations-of-the-saint">Christian martyr</a> save Jesus himself. It’s not the abundance of the martyrdom script I find frustrating, but rather its omnipresence. This ubiquity has real (and, to me, troubling) consequences; as Dr. Newmahr points out, “A self-identified male top who sometimes bottoms, for example, is more likely to claim identity as a top than as a switch. A woman with the same inclinations is likelier…to consider herself a switch.” <small>(See <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2010/11/24/playing-on-the-edge/">Playing on the Edge: Sadomasochism, Risk, and Intimacy</a>, p. 109, ¶2.)</small></p> <p>In other words, this goes some distance towards explaining that “<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2010/11/27/search-for-pictures-of-men-being-submissive-and-you-end-up-seeing-pictures-of-women-being-dominant/">the number problem</a>“—the assertion that there are simply not as many dominant women as there are dominant men—is an unfortunate cultural construction.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/3360280598http://malesubmissionart.com/post/3360280598Fri, 18 Feb 2011 01:33:54 -0800tumblrizemarkssolo<img src="http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lfmklwR6KU1qzs83zo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>Facing away from the camera while on all fours, a bald, naked man presents his ass to be caned by a woman smiling into the camera. She wears a T-shirt, jeans, and multi-colored socks.</p> <p>This photo was brought to my attention by <a href="http://molly-ren.tumblr.com/">Molly Ren</a>, who simply wrote, “This photo sums up everything that Male Submission Art is about.” Well, <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2008/11/19/malesubmissionartcom-or-why-i-am-crowdsourcing-my-own-pornography/">perhaps at first</a>. What Male Submission Art is about these days, however, is less the images and much more the <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2010/10/13/its-not-changing-the-world-thats-hard/">wonderful responses</a> to them. Thankfully, here, too, this image provides a fantastic showcase. To wit, here’s one thread of commentary this picture has received online:</p> <p><a href="http://iheartsmut.tumblr.com/post/1335557385">iheartsmut</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>I love it too!  I have my domme moments, so far just in my head, but I think, geez, I need a new wardrobe before I can try any of this.  Maybe not.  Love her impish look, too—another encouraging sign, because I know I don’t have a bitch goddess in me.</p> <p><a href="http://continuousstateofdesire.tumblr.com/post/1196748389/i-adore-this-pic-she-is-cute-she-is-smiling">continuousstateofdesire</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>I adore this pic.  She is cute, she is smiling, and she holds a cane.  I wish there were more D/s images where the Domme is not dressed in stereotypical atire (not that there’s anything wrong with that once in a while).  This pic gives me hope that the cute, unassuming, woman at work or at the cafe is in reality a pervy Domme who might want me to crawl around for her. </p> <p><a href="http://ireensarrows.tumblr.com/post/1169850588">ireensarrows</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p><a href="http://dishevelleddomina.tumblr.com/post/1169809206/awwwa-look-at-the-cute-redheaded-domme-in-comfy">dishevelleddomina</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>Awwwa, look at the cute redheaded domme in comfy clothes preparing to cane her yummy bald fucktoy…</p> <p>sigh of contentment.</p> </blockquote> <p>This picture makes me so many kinds of happy. It reminds me of the one time a sub told me that I cannot possibly go about dominatrixing in my cute striped socks. Why yes, sweetheart, I think I can. (Not him, though. He got dumped.)</p> </blockquote> </blockquote> </blockquote> <p>The <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2010/12/02/the-bdsm-community-ghetto-and-other-cultural-problems/">BDSM community ghetto</a>, which I argue has been a largely self-imposed social stricture of internalized exclusion, does seem to be <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/368500094/bent-at-the-waist-a-naked-man-in-darkness-dangles">betraying its frailty</a>. I am at once unspeakably proud and enormously humbled to recognize <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2011/01/09/censorship-is-cultural-terrorism-and-other-things-i-think-about-predilectionaz-com-interview/">whatever small part I’ve had in tearing down these walls</a>.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/2939274347http://malesubmissionart.com/post/2939274347Wed, 26 Jan 2011 02:17:55 -0800photograph<p>On March 22, I’ll be <a href="http://thecsph.org/upcoming-sexuality-workshops/#Mar2011">speaking at The CSPH</a>. Here’s the presentation title and description I just confirmed:</p> <blockquote> <p><strong>Remaking Male Submission: Confronting sexism in BDSM</strong></p> <p>Oscar Wilde once said, “Everything in the world is about sex, except sex. Sex is about power.” In this interactive seminar and slideshow, we’ll examine the nature of sex and power by exploring common cultural depictions of sexually dominant women, and especially submissive men. Join maymay, a sexually submissive man himself and curator of the crowd-sourced erotic photography blog <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/">MaleSubmissionArt.com</a>, to tackle deeply-held beliefs about gender and challenge assumptions about “kinky” sex. Just how prevalent, or lacking, is imagery of submissive men? Further, does the existing imagery really offer an alternative to mainstream sexual stereotyping, or does it actually serve to reify the—pun intended—dominant paradigm of male power? Is the public BDSM subculture a haven of free expression, or simply another cage of rigid gender roles dressed up (often literally) in different clothes?</p> </blockquote> <p>If you’re in or around the Providence, Rhode Island area in March, please come out to <a href="http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=179517638754175">this event</a>. :) If not, please spread the word.</p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/2937532899http://malesubmissionart.com/post/2937532899Tue, 25 Jan 2011 21:58:19 -0800<img src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ldvb8kgNrl1qzs83zo1_r1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1667" rel="attachment wp-att-1667"></a>A man rests naked in a fetal position, one foot cozily curled around the other, laying on the legs of his partner.</p> <p>This is an adorable image, provided by T-anon, who had the following explanation for it:</p> <blockquote><p>This is a photo I took of my partner just after a rather fun bout of BDSM. Once I had untied him from the bedpost he curled into my thigh, shuddering and moaning that he loved me. I just about exploded with the rush of adoration. He was so beautiful in that position with the ruddy marks from my nails across his back, the blindfold and the medical restraints still tied to him. I simply had to take a photo.</p> <p>It has since become a mutual favourite, commemorating our love and our trust. We thought it was worth putting on this site as a way of supporting safe and healthy sex along with the beauty that is submissive men.</p></blockquote> <p>Ordinarily, I try to have something especially witty or insightful to say when I post here. In this case, however, I feel adding too much of my own would merely be a shadow to the literal and emotional light emanating from this photograph.</p> <p>I am sincerely thankful to T-anon and their partner for sharing a moment of such evident love with me, and I am sincerely grateful to have the privilege of sharing it more widely with others in the world we all share.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/2427531172http://malesubmissionart.com/post/2427531172Wed, 22 Dec 2010 22:26:43 -0800tumblrize<img src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lcmzjr5eqv1qzs83zo1_r10_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1645" rel="attachment wp-att-1645"></a></p> <p>This image was submitted by <a href="http://jasoncwoodson.tumblr.com/">Jason C. Woodson</a>, who’s also its creator. The artwork is part of a <a href="http://www.jasoncwoodson.com/portfolio">series called <cite>Bound (You Felons On Trial)</cite></a>. I’ll leave analysis of the image itself in Jason’s words alone:</p> <blockquote cite="http://www.jasoncwoodson.com/portfolio"><p><cite>Bound (You Felons On Trial)</cite> was created in response to the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Criminal_Justice_and_Immigration_Act_2008">Criminal Justice and Immigration Act 2008</a>, a bill introduced [in Britain] to ban extreme forms of pornography. In an article published on the Index for Censorship website, lawyer <a href="http://www.indexoncensorship.org/2008/05/sex-crime-2008/">John Lovatt advised</a> that <q cite="http://www.indexoncensorship.org/2008/05/sex-crime-2008/">There are many books it would be safer to mutilate—or destroy altogether.</q></p> <p>The idea of consenting adults burning books in their backyards to avoid an intrusive State was alarming to me. As a gay artist whose work is often sexual in nature and could be seen by some as of an obscene character as described under <a href="http://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/2008/4/part/5/crossheading/pornography-etc">Section 63 of the Act</a>, I was reminded of a poem by Walt Whitman. Entitled <cite><a href="http://www.bartleby.com/142/105.html">You Felons on Trial</a>, it asks, <q cite="http://www.bartleby.com/142/105.html">Who am I too that I am not on trial or in prison?</q></cite></p> <p>Many classes of people, such as the BDSM community, will be affected by this legislation. That’s why I chose to photograph a male nude in a BDSM act. The images are defaced but hidden inside them run lines from Whitman’s work, ending with the last line of the poem: <q cite="http://www.bartleby.com/142/105.html">And henceforth I will not deny them—for how can I deny myself?</q></p></blockquote> <p><a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/271520580/in-forbidding-darkness-a-young-man-is">I’ve discussed §63 before</a>. At best misguided and at worst malicious, the law criminalizes possession of sexual depictions the State finds objectionable. It is not hyperbole to explain that under this legislation, <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/917306034/a-shirtless-man-manually-pleasures-a-naked-woman">you are subject to pain of criminal prosecution <em>even if someone else sends you the objectionable material</em></a>.</p> <p>Laws like this, <a href="http://kinkontap.com/?p=937">frequently lobbied for</a> by <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2010/07/29/anti-porn-is-pro-censorship-even-if-they-say-theyre-not/">pro-censorship groups euphemistically calling themselves anti-pornography feminists</a> (or, <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/?p=2064">more frighteningly, anti-trafficking</a>), are a clear and present danger to the citizenry—to <em>you</em>. They represent a (barely) pseudo-fascist moralism borne of the same virulent disease as rampant nationalism or religious doctrine, and corrupt the humanity of government with a two-faced appeal to <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7AWnfFRc7g">an individual’s most humane ability: empathy</a>. A form of <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/roomfordebate/2010/11/22/do-body-scanners-make-us-safer/a-waste-of-money-and-time">security theater, it takes advantage of a demanding and ignorant public</a> by using the lowest common denominator of reason and behavior to craft law and policy—but the <a href="http://www.ted.com/talks/philip_howard.html">lowest common denominator does not make for sound law</a>.</p> <p>Sexuality is a frequent scapegoat in attempts to justify power-grabbing laws, and <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/494491786/a-couple-embraces-in-front-of-st-patricks">you need to be concerned about that regardless of your sexuality</a> or place of residence. Australia has recently seen the creation of a literal secret government Internet blacklist whose scope, <a href="http://www.smh.com.au/news/home/technology/banned-hyperlinks-could-cost-you-11000-a-day/2009/03/17/1237054787635.html?page=fullpage">according to the Sydney Morning Herald</a>, “had been rapidly expanded from child porn to other material including political discussions.” Since it’s all on one list, I guess the Australian government considers child pornography and political discussion to be the same thing.</p> <p>Americans enjoy precious First Amendment protection, but the anti-porn pseudo-fascist moralists are batting for the same pro-censorship team as the RIAA, who have <a href="http://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2010/09/censorship-internet-takes-center-stage-online">recently introduced the Combating Online Infringement and Counterfeits Act (COICA)</a>. A copy-cat law, COICA would mandate <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2010/11/27/technology/27torrent.html">government-decreed Internet censorship</a> of any site found to be infringing record and movie industry copyrights. Since copyright infringement is a relatively unpopular cause, mark my words: child porn will be a future excuse.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1725162943http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1725162943Sun, 28 Nov 2010 23:59:51 -0800tumblrizephotographsolo<embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" src="http://assets.tumblr.com/swf/audio_player_black.swf?audio_file=http://www.tumblr.com/audio_file/1702071850/tumblr_lcjqwmperv1qzs83z&color=FFFFFF" height="27" width="207" quality="best" wmode="opaque"></embed><br/><br/><blockquote><p>Search for pictures of men being submissive, and you end up seeing pictures of women being dominant.</p></blockquote> <p>Changing that simple fact was what Male Submission Art sought to address. In <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/MaleSubmissionArt-Masocast.mp3">this 20 minute audio clip</a>, recorded <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/?p=2361">way back in April of 2009</a>, I talk a bit about the current media landscape with regards to representations of submissive masculinity, which should be interesting listening if you come here “for the articles.”</p> <p>And on that note, <a href="http://days.maybemaimed.com/post/1696868622/its-hard-to-have-a-serious-discussion-on-the">you might also particularly enjoy Issue 7 of Filament Magazine</a>.</p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1702071850http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1702071850Sat, 27 Nov 2010 05:00:21 -0800tumblrize<img src="http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lcd8ln3k5W1qzs83zo1_r3_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>A man’s back bears raised red marks that spell out the words, “I LOVE YOU.”</p> <p>This photograph was submitted anonymously but arrived with a heartwarming note attached. So heartwarming, in fact, that despite my own current solitude I audibly responded to myself reading it:</p> <blockquote> <p>I’ve had a rough few weeks. A series of setbacks in my career and social life have made me feel very isolated and alone. In a moment of weakness, I asked my Girlfriend to show me that I am needed, that I am worth something to someone.</p> <p>This was her answer.</p> <p>It couldn’t have been more perfect. Her willingness to mark me proves her ownership of me. Her authority and acceptance of me as her property makes me worthwhile.</p> <p>I love you בעלה.</p> </blockquote> <p>For the monolingual, <a href="http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/%D7%91%D7%A2%D7%9C%D7%94">בעלה</a> is the Hebrew word for “Mistress,” which is relevant because it gives her two roles: Girlfriend, and בעלה. Far from unusual, many relationships between two people have more than two roles. The monolith of “husband” and “wife,” or “boyfriend” and “girlfriend” or even simply “partner,” is a dramatic oversimplification, one that too often obscures relationships like “supporter,” “sounding board,” “buddy,” or even “cheerleader,” all of which and more are <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2010/10/28/how-to-maintain-a-not-fucked-up-ds-relationship/">crucial for relationships to thrive</a>.</p> <p>Further, this is not an unusual concept, or even one the mainstream rejects. Yet its application to the realm of relationship choice is bizarrely downright taboo. I’m reminded of a recent email chain letter I received the other day, which read, in part:</p> <blockquote> <p>When I was little,<br/> I used to believe in the concept of one best friend,<br/> And then I started to become a woman.<br/> And then I found out that if you allow your heart to open up,<br/> God would show you the best in many friends.</p> <p>[…]</p> <p>It may all be wrapped up in one woman, But for many, it’s wrapped up in several.<br/> One from 7th grade,<br/> One from high school,<br/> Several from the college years,<br/> A couple from old jobs…</p> </blockquote> <p>Lots of people are so ready to accept the need for many friends. Why are they so eager to <a href="http://polyadvocacy.ca/and-what-about-the-children">demonize</a> the need for many loves, as a <a href="http://www.cbc.ca/canada/british-columbia/story/2010/11/23/bc-polygamy-polyamoury-hearing.html">new Canadian law set to criminalize multi-partnered relationships with jail time up to 5 years seems to do</a>? Similarly, many people readily accept that different people’s ideas of worth are different, often citing “one man’s trash is another man’s treasure,” but then turn right around and decry BDSM’ers notions of what makes us feel worthy of love.</p> <p>When it comes to self-worth, love is <em>not</em> different than friendship. <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2009/02/27/8-things-submissive-men-want-from-a-dominant-partner/">Both must play by the same rules</a>: yours.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p> <p><strong>Update (Dec. 27, 2010):</strong> Apparently <a href="http://inbar--1423.tumblr.com/post/2486444082/malesubmissionart-a-mans-back-bears-raised-red">someone thinks this post is anti-Semitic</a> because I got the translation wrong. They say the Hebrew word doesn’t mean “Mistress,” but rather “Husband.” What they may not have realized is that I looked the word up in the dictionary (as they’d have seen if they bothered to look at the link the word points to, so even if I’m wrong about its meaning, I’m not a primary source) and that I’m Jewish. Further, while I’m no longer fluent in it, Hebrew was my first language. It seems I’m not the only one who may be jumping to conclusions based on incomplete information.</p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1664396263http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1664396263Tue, 23 Nov 2010 17:39:00 -0800tumblrizemarksphotographsolo<img src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lbk4llVsqA1qzs83zo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1617" rel="attachment wp-att-1617"></a>One man licks the stomach of another whose hands remain at his sides, near the back of unbuttoned jeans slipping down his hips.</p> <p>The anonymous contributor who suggested this photograph offered a delightfully unexpected interpretation:</p> <blockquote><p>Despite the men not being my ‘type’, I find myself coming back to this photo again and again. I think it’s because the man whose face you can see seems like the top to me—there’s a stillness to the other man, with his hands on the backs of his thighs, like he was told not to move or touch and had to hold onto himself to make sure he didn’t do either. The look on the other man’s face is also beautiful to me; he might be looking up (usually a submissive position in most porn) but he seems fierce and watchful.</p></blockquote> <p>It’s interesting to note that “watchful” can accurately describe both so-called submissive and dominant behavior. Can “<a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/643300090/laying-on-his-stomach-naked-on-a-bed-a-man-with">fierce</a>”? I think so; the man on the right has what appears to be a scar on his side, and if that man is the submissive partner, then of the two, his body is showing more grit.</p> <p>Reversing assumptions is a precious skill; <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/364865244/a-young-man-leashed-between-the-legs-of-a-young">compassion and empathy are circumscribed without it</a>. Although I first assumed submissiveness in the man whose face we can see because of the way he is licking the other model, once I understood the alternative possibility, I noticed that the man doing the licking is the active partner here. And, as our anonymous contributor correctly states, since the man doing the licking is in the stereotypically submissive position, if <em>he</em> is the submissive partner, then it’s <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2008/10/25/equating-passivity-with-sexual-submissiveness-is-a-stupid-mistake/">his activeness itself</a> that queers this image.</p> <p>So much for a simple narrative.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1514515235http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1514515235Mon, 08 Nov 2010 00:08:09 -0800tumblrizehomosexualphotograph<img src="http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lbju6mQ4VB1qzs83zo1_r3_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1605" rel="attachment wp-att-1605"></a>In the glow of sunlight, a shirtless man on his back locks eyes with his clothed partner looking down at him.</p> <p>Dylan sent in this photograph with the following note:</p> <blockquote><p>This is a photo of myself and my partner Cedar. A friend shot a series of photos for us on a winter morning in Cedar’s bedroom. I love the look on his face as he looks up at me: honest, willing, open, attentive and very turned on.</p> <p>I am a genderqueer boy (ftm), and Cedar is cisgender. The degree to which C.’s being came through in the photos is remarkable to me—his expressiveness was encouraged, not restricted, by the presence of the camera.</p></blockquote> <p>While I presume a power dynamic was palpable for Dylan or Cedar in the moment, it’s extremely subtle for me as a viewer. Nevertheless, it’s there, in Cedar’s splayed arms, in his nakedness contrasted with Dylan’s being clothed, in their eyes and, especially, in their mouths. Even from this angle, Dylan’s lips seem sharp and piercing while Cedar’s seem flush and parting. (Also, wow, he has pretty lips.)</p> <p>So the camera, as useful and remarkable a tool as it is, has its limits, because the photograph alone is extremely soft spoken about Cedar’s submissive stance here. That’s where Dylan’s note comes in: realizing Dylan is genderqueer adds a whole new layer of implication on an already somewhat ambiguously gendered photograph. Now we also see Dylan’s travel, begun where the hegemony says sexual power cannot exist—the female and the feminine—and ending in a place of sexual domination, which the hegemony says only men can obtain. Cedar’s submission, in that light, is all the more transgressive—and all the more accepting.</p> <p>Thanks for sharing this with us.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1513237213http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1513237213Sun, 07 Nov 2010 20:37:32 -0800tumblrizephotograph<img src="http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l9k736UjW81qzs83zo1_r2_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1564" rel="attachment wp-att-1564"></a>Kneeling naked on the floor, a muscular man whose wrists and ankles are shackled bows his head.</p> <p>This old photograph was suggested by Olga. One of the first things that I noticed were the man’s shackles and the fact that they were broken. What would perhaps imply resistance in a different context seems to accentuate acceptance and submission in this one.</p> <p>Olga’s observations focused on the model himself, and are incredibly detailed:</p> <blockquote><p>There are two things that enchant me most in this photo. First, the lines of the figure: the perfectly round curve from neck to waist, another perfectly round curve of buttocks, smooth thighs, and then all the rest of the muscles. There’s a lot of attention paid to the female body in our culture, but I find the male body as enticing in all its living, breathing harmony, and this picture is a brilliant example.</p> <p>Second, the pose. Of course, this kneeling pose with the curved back holds my eye: this is what I like to see as a dominant woman. This strong, big man, in a submissive pose, is a beautiful sight[…]. But the most enticing detail of this pose is the way his hands are turned palms up. He doesn’t lean on them, and it adds a lot of tension in the pose he holds. He offers them open and defenseless. I can’t help but think about what can be done with his hands, how they can be put to use in service, or how they can be tortured. His hands are his gift of service, as is his entire body and his entire self.</p></blockquote> <p>Curating imagery like this has taught me a lot, mostly because many of the images people suggest offer fascinating insights into their <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/214525902/a-naked-man-crouches-in-a-bathtub-underneath-the">relationship with power</a>, and especially <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/175406586/a-handcuffed-and-blindfolded-man-lays-on-a-bed-as">how it interrelates with their understanding of gender</a>. Here, Olga’s description clearly shows that other people’s <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/217979796/at-the-edge-of-a-cliff-a-nude-man-on-his-hands">dogmatic interpretations</a> of what is or is not submissive, what is or is not dominant, and especially <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/135574134/a-naked-man-hangs-an-american-flag-against-a-brick">what is or is not manly</a>, have no power over one’s own sexual desires unless one lets them. And frankly, yes, <em>as a submissive man</em>, I no longer see any reason to let anyone else dictate my sexuality to me.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1215281201http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1215281201Thu, 30 Sep 2010 00:02:05 -0700tumblrizeblack and whitephotographsolo<img src="http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l9i4jnCRia1qzs83zo1_r1_400.jpg"/><br/><br/><p>A naked man stands before a clothed woman, holding her sides gently as she squeezes his ass with her hands and presses herself against him.</p> <p>This photograph was suggested by <a href="http://ranai.wordpress.com">Ranai</a>, whose description I can only describe as incredibly sexy:</p> <blockquote> <p>I admire the self-control it takes to be a submissive lover. To be alert for instructions, to listen to what the other wants in the throes of passion, and transform it into action. To keep going, and going, or change pace at a moment’s notice. To open up and offer one’s body to something painful or uncomfortable, when there’s a conflicting instinct to curl up and protect oneself. To be gentle even while the other is being rough, and to give it hard and fast when hard and fast is called for.</p> <p>The picture tells a story of deliberately chosen inequality in action. She already digs her nails into his backside with abandon, enjoying it when she feels him flinch. He still touches her only lightly, as he has not yet been told to do more.</p> <p>I love seeing the beautiful hair on this man’s legs and arms. I hope he has a hairy chest too. Hair, for me, is a joy to see and touch: it’s one aspect of my own physical preferences.</p> </blockquote> <p>Ranai makes me wish I was better at emotive writing, however my skill lies in <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/675818748/two-men-embrace-outdoors-one-whos-shirtless-and">analytics</a> and as such I often feel ill-equipped to discuss the emotionality of such pictures. Thankfully, Ranai perfectly describes not only the challenge but also the essential drive of submissive sexuality, for me: to open up when there’s a conflicting instinct to curl, to be gentle when confronted with force, and to <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/136225950/a-young-man-is-shackled-and-leashed-to-spreader">treat others not as I would be treated but as they would have me treat them</a>.</p> <p>But to limit such things to sex play seems ludicrously wasteful, and one need not look hard to see <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/271520580/in-forbidding-darkness-a-young-man-is">applications of this in all sorts of places</a>. This is unsurprising, as sexuality is ultimately a language, full of <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/137619403/a-naked-man-on-his-hands-and-knees-bows-very-low">idioms and expressions</a>, along with awkward moments of miscommunication when we’re still learning.</p> <p>Anyway, Ranai also offered this really encouraging note:</p> <blockquote> <p>P.S. Hi maymay, I’m seeing more and more Male Submission Art pictures used by people as journal icons and discussion forum avatars. This is a pleasant change in the making. Yay!</p> </blockquote> <p>Yes, very much yay! I’ve been noticing this, too. I actually think <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/601778674/while-wearing-a-head-harness-and-a-ball-gag-a-man">this is incredibly important</a>, because it begins to inch towards more equitable representation of men and women in the media, both social media and, hopefully one day, mainstream media.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p> <p><strong>Attribution update:</strong> I received a very nice note from the photographer of this image, <a href="http://www.michaelberkowitz.com/">Michael Berkowitz</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>I’m happy to see people finding my work of interest and I appreciate the exposure…. Also, it’s good to see your site and what images you have in your archive, what your audience wants to see. I can try to include more of that type of image when I’m shooting. Also, to those who like my style and are in the NYC area, I am <a href="http://www.michaelberkowitz.com/commission.htm">available for commissions</a>. Thanks.</p> </blockquote> <p>Michael can also be found as <a href="http://mjbw39.deviantart.com/">mjbw39 on DeviantArt.com</a>.</p> <p><a href="http://dishevelleddomina.tumblr.com/post/1083575593/sometimes-in-my-excitement-and-eagerness-to-take">dishevelleddomina</a>:</p> <blockquote> <p>Sometimes in my excitement and eagerness to take all of your body, offered so deliciously and temptingly, I pinch and squeeze, aroughness born of hunger.</p> <p>Never for a second allow this to fool you into thinking you have similar license. UnlessI tell you I want it rough you better handle me like hand-woven silk, else you will regret it. Touch me gently or I’ll not let you touch me at all.</p> </blockquote>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1209612918http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1209612918Wed, 29 Sep 2010 01:58:00 -0700tumblrizephotograph<img src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l7znirxOvS1qzs83zo1_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1557" rel="attachment wp-att-1557"></a>Bound with rope at the wrists and ankles, a naked man lays limp in the arms of a larger woman who holds him by his waist and collar high above her head.</p> <p>Here’s a captivating image, suggested by Pimmie, who wrote:</p> <blockquote><p>I have a picture for you by the Dutch photographer <a href="http://www.erwinolaf.com/">Erwin Olaf</a> called <cite>Powerlifting</cite>.</p> <p>I love the little details in this artwork, like the placing of the woman’s hands. She holds the man’s weight up on two very vulnerable spots on his body. Her dominance speaks from the look on her face alone. And I love her body shape in this context; a powerful stance on delicate shoes. [I love t]he surrender in the man’s pose.</p> <p>The overall impression of this picture, for me, is of a woman showing her prey or catch.</p></blockquote> <p>“Surrender” is so often linked with failure or loss, things that are in turn associated with negative connotations of “submission.” But surrender is also, and simply, the cessation of resistance. It can be an act of acceptance or an embrace; <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/328542139/a-young-man-reclines-on-a-couch-in-the-sunlight">not a failure to assert</a>, but an action motivated by the desire to explore or, sometimes, to relax.</p> <p>Compositionally, I’m conflicted about posting this image here because the subject is ambiguous; is the photo more about her, or him? Ultimately, of course, they both contribute to it. Interestingly, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Erwin_Olaf&oldid=340571249">according to Wikipedia</a>, <q cite="http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Erwin_Olaf&oldid=340571249">one of [Erwin Olaf’s] early photographs was once expelled from a show on the basis of <em>not</em> containing nudity.</q> Clearly, <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/879252420/a-clothed-man-is-bound-to-a-heavy-chair-with-long">any criteria may always cut both ways</a>.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1039185461http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1039185461Mon, 30 Aug 2010 16:20:50 -0700tumblrizeblack and whitebondagephotograph<img src="http://30.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l7vrcuvBM01qzs83zo1_r3_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1550" rel="attachment wp-att-1550"></a>A naked man tied in full-body natural-colored hemp rope bondage lays among an assortment of earth-toned and red pillows.</p> <p>I’m mildly colorblind and so <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/449441672/crouching-in-darkness-a-man-with-long-hair">images that use color as a primary means of expression</a> are often difficult for me to understand or wholly appreciate. However, I enjoy this photograph because this man’s beard is colored similarly to my own, and while he seems to be shaven near his genitals I imagine the redness of his beard still reflects his natural coloring. <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/117950548/a-man-whose-wrists-are-handcuffed-behind-his-back">My bright red pubic hair</a> is the lightest hair on my body. Maybe that’s meaningful.</p> <p>It’s so, so hard for me to look at pictures like this these days. They <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/136225950/a-young-man-is-shackled-and-leashed-to-spreader">make me crave</a> what I see and, like magic, they seem somehow possible for others and just out of my reach. <a href="http://maymay.net/blog/2010/08/25/settling-in-san-francisco/">That hurts <em>so</em> much</a>. I wish I were a poet so I wouldn’t have to use so many words to describe how I feel.</p> <p>Maybe I’ll just use less words and more trust from now on. All I’ve got left is hope.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p> <p>(via <a href="http://artistryofmale.blogspot.com/2010/05/beauty-of-day-051810.html">artistryofmale.blogspot.com</a>)</p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1026977007http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1026977007Sat, 28 Aug 2010 13:53:17 -0700tumblrizebondagephotographsolo<img src="http://28.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l7r2tn3usm1qzs83zo1_r3_500.jpg"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1542" rel="attachment wp-att-1542"></a>A large man smiles in obvious delight, enjoying the sensation of two clothespins on his nipples.</p> <p>Peter suggested this awesome photograph, and wrote:</p> <blockquote><p>On the rare occasions that a submissive male is portrayed, he is usually depicted as skinny, young, effeminate and shy. I love this picture because it does not fit in any of those clichés.</p></blockquote> <p>I would add only one more cliché, perhaps the most important of all: that submission is portrayed as something <em>undesired</em> and <em>undesireable</em>. That cliché is the most insulting, dangerous, and untrue of all.</p> <p>Submission is freedom, and can be <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/293181170/a-man-bites-down-on-a-staff-while-another-pokes">healing if you let it be</a>. It’s okay to want permission to be what, who, and how you are, connected with another or with yourself by a resonance of your own making. Like a tuning fork, <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2009/02/27/8-things-submissive-men-want-from-a-dominant-partner/">loud and insistent but audible only once grounded with a force that you embrace</a>.</p> <p>It’s okay to want such permission, even if you don’t need it. Because, actually, you don’t need permission from anyone but yourself.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1013352955http://malesubmissionart.com/post/1013352955Thu, 26 Aug 2010 01:12:58 -0700tumblrizephotographsolo<img src="http://27.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l6touaTI6n1qzs83zo1_500.png"/><br/><br/><p><a href="http://publisher.malesubmissionart.com/?attachment_id=1537" rel="attachment wp-att-1537"></a>A British Prime Minister kneels to kiss the hand of the Queen of England.</p> <p>When I first looked at this picture that Faelyn suggested, I didn’t really know what to make of it. I mean, from my irreverent perspective, the stuffy British government isn’t exactly <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/434330030/the-penis-of-a-lean-man-is-leashed-loosely-with">good wank material</a>. But <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/917306034/a-shirtless-man-manually-pleasures-a-naked-woman">context is important</a>, and the note Faelyn sent along with the image is gripping:</p> <blockquote><p>On the surface, the femdom het aspect of things is pretty obvious. It goes deeper than mere appearances, though.</p> <p>Arguably the most important relationship arc in <cite><a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0436697/">The Queen</a></cite> is between the fictionalized characters of Tony Blair and Elizabeth II. The story begins with his election as a young and charming Prime Minister in the mid-90s. She’s unimpressed with his newer, touchy-feely approach to governance. He’s thrown off by the formalities of his position: he thinks of himself as an elected politician, and has to adjust to the idea that officially/symbolically he serves her.</p> <p>There’s a magnificent scene early on where he learns to kneel to her and, rather than declaring himself PM or asking for it, wait for her to grant him the right to run what is officially <em>her</em> government. It’s uncomfortable and they both leave as soon as possible. As the story progresses, however, he comes to really <em>want</em> to serve her, and she learns to accept his service. The second kneeling scene is a thing of <em>beauty</em>—she’s upset, he’s conciliatory—and afterward they stay together to talk, having created a bond.</p> <p>I spend a lot of time looking for crypto-femdom het relationships in media and this is by far one of my favorites (with Daniel Craig as Bond/Judy Dench as M coming in a close second…).</p></blockquote> <p><a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/?tag=narrative">Narratives like this</a> are everywhere, not because they are inherently part of the act, but because you—the viewer—<a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/97517693/a-couple-sits-at-a-table-in-a-restaurant-the">imbue the act with your narrative</a>. Wherever you go, you’ll see mirrors of <a href="http://maybemaimed.com/2007/03/08/bdsm-as-an-emotional-sexuality-all-its-own/">your most authentic feelings</a>. The tragedy is that <a href="http://malesubmissionart.com/post/91287519/a-man-naked-sits-to-a-chair-that-his-ankles-are">you are so often told not to embrace them</a>.</p> <p>Faelyn also sent a kind note, for which I am very grateful:</p> <blockquote><p>Thank you so much for your web presence! This site and your blog have been an enormous help to me as I’ve been figuring out the nature of my own desires and trying to handle them ethically/sensibly.</p></blockquote> <p>Thanks, Faelyn. That really does mean a lot.</p> <p>-<a href="http://maybemaimed.com/">maymay</a></p>http://malesubmissionart.com/post/921370976http://malesubmissionart.com/post/921370976Sun, 08 Aug 2010 00:04:52 -0700tumblrizenarrative